Tuesday, January 3, 2012

The Staring Game

In many gyms, whether of the hardcore or fitness center variety, one key selling point for men, is whether there's attractive women working out there - or not. Usually, guys want to join a gym that has heavy weights, good music, and beautiful women. But why is it that most gym have fewer and fewer female populations? Why is it that some gyms have gone to single-gender days? Why is it that some gyms have even gone to the point of being Women Only?.

I think the idea of Mens Only gym has certain gay overtones to it -- I'm not being homophobic, just honest. I don't know of any heterosexual man that would find himself so distracted by the presence of women, that he couldn't lift and/or train in peace. But can the same blanket statement be made by women? Can a woman - regardless of age, build, sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, income level, whatever, go into a gym wearing what a guy would (tank top 'n shorts) and train without being stared at? And is there really a huge difference between who's staring? Sure, a good looking, buff guy, that drove up in a beamer and has a big office job, might be a great sale over drinks, but his staring game and the poor man's or the blue collar man's, is about the same in the scheme of things. Staring is staring, and in most cases -- it's unwelcomed. So what avenues of recourse are available for women? How much of a response can be expected from someone looking at you? Are they saying anything? No. Are they touching you? No. Do you they come close to you? No. So what can be done? And a better question, what WILL be done?

I like to look, but I try to be suble -- I think this is what everyone who looks aspires to do -- look but discretely. But what happens when someone stares? What happens when someone EYE-F**KS YOU? Sorry for being vulgar, but there's a huge difference between checking someone out and staring, and then there's that slang term I used earlier (which is even worse than staring, we'll call it EFfing). What someone is EFfing you, lol - sorry, they are not only staring at you, but they are intentionally making you uncomfortable, they re-assert their presence each and everytime their victim looks or tries to make some kind of face or gesture acknowledging and condemning the conduct. Imagine having to play this deadend mind game while doing cardio. It's grounds to just bolt out of the gym for good.

So do we really need to have men on one day and women on other days? Do we need to have Womens Only gyms? I don't know, but I do know that if I was a guy being checked out here and there, I'd love it; HOWEVER, if I was checked out all the time and it made me uncomfortable and I had not way of stopping it, I know I'd be pretty irate -- to say the least!

As usual, I went to the champions to see what they had to say. I hope you all take something away from this post - as with all the others. Happy New Year!

" I don't have to really deal with those issues on a daily basis. My husband & I co-own the gym, where I train. So if guys are looking they are not obvious about it....I assume out of respect for my husband & myself. My husband & I have trained in other gyms though, where we do get our share of attention, but I feel that it was really us together that drew the looks. I agree with the ladies I don't let anything interfere with my training. When I am working out, I am in my own little bubble, just getting lost in my workout. I am not really noticing what the guy next to me is doing. I personally get more stares just doing errands like shopping than I ever have gotten in the gym."

IFBB Pro, Judy Gaillard


"I think attractive women will get looked at anywhere- even in the grocery store in sweatpants, lol it's just the way things are. The gym is no exception. I guess I don't even pay attention to it. I plug into my IPod and I go to work. I am there to train, to be alone with my thoughts, and to get the job done.">

Allison Moyer


"I feel if you are at the gym to truly workout and better yourself, you are not concerned with who is there, who is watching you or what they are thinking. I am so focused on my training when I'm at the gym that having to share it with men does not concern me. I also agree with Allison that men will look at you no matter where you are so get over it and do not let it stand in your way of achieving your goals!"

Tiffany Reffner, Npc Competitor


"EarPhone's Usually Deter Many. Hanging Around the Big Guys Always Helps..... On a More Seious Note.... I Agree, You Will get Bothered in or out of Gym, Sadly in Gym, we Need our Focus, and This Could be More of a Problem Then..... Ignoring Them can Help, Not Making eye Contact, Those That go to far... Report to the Manager, Without Breaking a Sweat."

Tracey Gottschalk-Pike



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1 comment:

  1. Think That was Some Great Advice to More Ladies Than we Think....

    ReplyDelete